How to Deal with Pain God’s Way—Part 4 How to ACTUALLY Do It

woman's palms opened upward

How do you actually deal with pain God’s way?

It’s easy to just spout off a list of do’s and don’ts or a bunch of key Bible verses like, “Consider it pure joy…, Rejoice in the Lord always…” (Jas 1:2, Phil 4:4).

But how do you really do it?

Having experienced a lot of pain in my life, like many of you, I want to know HOW to deal with it; to not let it consume me. And my most gracious Father has taught me—which I now gladly pass onto you.

But let me first say that I can only guide you. The Holy Spirit Himself will be the One who actually teaches and enables you to deal with your pain; to handle the hardships of life His way so that you can live a godly one (2 Pet 1: 3). The Lord wants to comfort you; to heal your wounds (see 2 Cor 1:3-4, Ps 147:3).

Additionally, you have a great High Priest who is able to sympathize with your weaknesses, who has been tempted in every way, just as you are (Heb 4:15). Did Jesus ever experience the pain of rejection, betrayal, mockery; the pain of being misunderstood, envied, unjustly accused; not to mention excruciating physical pain? Did He ever have a broken heart over the ones He came to save?

You know the answer. 

Yet in all that He did not sin!

My goal for you and me is that we not only get

 Healing and comfort in our suffering, but that we would not hurt God’s heart by sinning in our suffering.

God showed me that dealing with my pain is basically about receiving and being in a position to receive. We need to be…

Open-minded, Open-handed, and Open-hearted


We need to let the Holy Spirit change our thinking; to replace the lies we believe with His truth. To accept as fact truths like:

  • God is who He says He is, not who you think He is
  • God is sovereign, in control, all-wise, all powerful, good, loving, just, faithful…
  • Pain has a good purpose
  • Who you are in Christ
  • You’ll never understand everything about God

Allow God to change your mind. Believe that God wants to heal you and is more than able. 

Belief in the right stuff leads to relief!


If you are holding onto something too tight, you won’t be able to take what’s being offered. What I am talking about here is having an attitude of surrender. An “All I have is Yours” mindset. You and I must be willing to let go of our desires, our lack of understanding, our old way of thinking and acting, our pain and emotions, and our will. We must put “self” on the altar (Rom 12:1).


As you go to the Lord with an open mind and an open hand, you now have an open heart that is able to receive. Since you are no longer holding onto self, you are now in a position to receive the gifts of forgiveness, love, comfort, mercy, and healing which the Lord wants to freely give you.

It doesn’t mean that you no longer struggle, but that you are willing and striving to respond God’s way.

It means you are coming to Abba Father as a helpless humble child, knowing your need of Someone bigger than yourself.

It also means you are willing to receive discipline and direction.


This is God’s way of dealing with pain. Our way doesn’t work. It only hinders kingdom fruit production, leads to more heartache, and produces a joyless life.

Next time I’ll give you some very practical tips on the how.

Until then my friends,

Open up and it’ll blow your mind what your generous Daddy wants to give you!