Is Your Relationship with God Only One-sided?

How would you describe your relationship with God?

  • Wonderful
  • Mediocre
  • Disappointed
  • Disillusioned
  • Displeased
  • Dissatisfied
  • Confused
  • Stymied
  • Non-existent*

Here’s one HUGE fact that can change your relationship drastically:

Relationships are two-sided.


But when was the last time you thought about God’s side? Could it be that your interaction with God is not what you desire because you are only looking at yourself? Poor relationships result when one or both parties are focused only on themselves.

Whether a relationship is good or bad depends upon both parties.

Perhaps you’re involved with someone right now who’s completely self-absorbed and oblivious to you. Then you know a little bit about how God feels when His children do the same thing to Him!

In an ideal relationship, both sides give their all: a 100-100%, not 50-50%. God’s contribution to us is always perfect and complete; 100%. (If you doubt that look at the cross.) Ours? Not so much.

Of course, God understands that we are faulty and will always fall short ( Ps 78:39; Ps 103:14). That’s why He sent Jesus. He is understanding, compassionate, and patient. Nevertheless, although we cannot relate to God perfectly, He wants us to move in that direction; having a heart after His own heart; desiring to make Him happy as well as desiring for Him to make us happy.

Doesn’t God deserve that? We don’t deserve His mercy and grace, yet He gives that to all who are willing to receive. He is holy, pure, righteous (=always doing right), and good—we are not. We have it backwards.

We think we deserve the best in life when in reality it is God Himself who does. He is the One deserving honor and glory.

This truth has revolutionized my relationship with God! And it will do the same for you—if you apply it.

How do you start looking at God’s side of the relationship? Here are a few suggestions:

  • Read, believe, and act on what God says in His Word.
  • Ask Him to change your perspective as you interact with Him; to live with a He-focus instead of a me-focus.
  • When you read His love letter to you (the Bible), think how you can respond back in love.
  • Find out what pleases Him, what would make Him smile (Eph 5:10).
  • When you don’t understand something, ask for His point of view—the big picture. After all, He is omniscient and you’re not!
  • Humble yourself. Realize that He is the One that should receive first consideration.
  • Concede to His desires, not yours. God’s way is best!

Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.(Ps 37:4)

Your needs will be met—your Father God promises!

This mindset will enable you to live a life worthy of the Lord and please Him in every way (Col 1:10). Mutually loving and pleasing one another leads to a blissful relationship. Such sweet fellowship with your Creator is available to you.

Taste and see that the LORD is good. (Ps 34:8)

God gives and gives and gives. He gave the most precious gift of all—His Son as a demonstration of His incalculable love for us. How could we not respond back in love?!

Until next time my friends, You can trust God to fulfill His side with perfection. Will you strive to reciprocate?

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Mat 6:33)

If you’d like to delve further into this topic please check out my first book, Our Knowable God: Learning How to Relate to Our Invisible Lord.

*If you do not have a relationship with God or not sure if you do, click here.


THE HOLY BIBLE: NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®.  NIV®.  Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica.  All rights reserved worldwide.

This Post Has 3 Comments

  1. Rose Noland

    Thank you for your encouragement! I needed that!

  2. Kenneth Gray


    I have a one sided relationship with God. I pray and pray and pray….. , I talk and talk and talk….. , but still God remains silent. 41 years of unanswered prayers and complete silence is all I’ve got. How is this complete lack of communication/involvement in my life a relationship? Can only one person have a relationship? Not as far as I can tell/see. A relationship requires interaction from both sides of the relationship. Yes I know what God did in the past, and yes that is worthy of gratitude and praise. Hallelujah. A relationship is two or more people, two parties, that interact in the here and now. There is no way for me to actually interact with God unless God makes contact first. As long as God remains silent there can’t be an actual relationship.

    Thanks for the opportunity to say my piece.
    God bless you, in Jesus holy name, Amen.

    1. Rose Noland

      I hear your frustration, Kenneth! I have 2 suggestions:
      1. Make sure you are in a relationship with God through faith in Jesus Christ alone and not on your works.
      2. Read Our Knowable God: Learning How to Relate to Our Invisible Lord
      In there I explain what God’s AND our roles are.

      If you want to talk further, please contact me directly (see our contact us page). I truly want your relationship with God to be vibrant and growing-not one-sided!

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